"Truskavets water will relieve your allergies in only 5 days".
"I wish they wouldn't make rash promises".
Ky wondered if I had been cured. I said I thought not but perhaps lightly salted.
Meals were at 9:00 am, 2:00 pm and 7:00 pm. It was hard to tell one meal from another, never mind one day from another. No fresh vegetables or salads. Tanya finally stopped going for most meals, maybe one per day. She would go to the market and buy tomatoes, cucumbers, fresh dill and lettuce as well as sausage, cheese and juice. The people at our table would always ask where she was and it took all the power in me not to tell them she was too drunk to come to dinner. Tanya would have killed me if I had but just the thought of doing it made me laugh.
We arrived home at 12:00 noon. Two hours late. Somewhere in the darkness, the train lost two hours travel time. Why? Who knows. Just to prolong our agony? Stifling hot, no windows opened in our car. 20 young Polish construction guys got on in L'viv enroute to Dnipro, drinking vodka straight from the bottle and in general being rowdy. We got two in our compartment, Oh, Joyful!! Their boss and the train attendant from our car shut them all down hard about 10:00 pm but it took some doing. They started again about 7:00 except for those who were still sleeping it off.
We were so glad to be home. Tanya went straight to her flowers and garden, while I went to see Bobik and Volk. Then we had lunch, a shower and I hit the computer while Tanya hit the dirt. She spent all afternoon digging in 10 meters of shrub for a hedge and also 7 small evergreens all of which she bought in Truskavets for under $20. She also transplanted a bunch of bulbs she had rooting in shavings in our "greenhouse".
Tomorrow we have more transplanting and must water the entire garden areas. No rain while we were gone. Also we have to shop and cook for Paskha Sunday.
Showing posts with label Truskavets. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Truskavets. Show all posts
Friday, April 17, 2009
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Procedures (Protsidoori) 3
Cleansing of the Lower Bowel – The notion that the body is full of “poisons” elicits little puppy wiggles and goose bumps of anticipation from the naturopathetic homeopathological granola-munching, fibre-obsessed herbivorous crowd. And they have positively organic orgasms at the word CLEANSING followed either by the words BLOOD or BOWEL. This in spite of the fact there is no sound scientific evidence of any “poisons” in a normal functioning human, that the cleansing actually removes anything measureable and that the process has any effect on health or longevity. I passed* this four day procedure. Besides with friends like mine, who needs enemas?
Mary had a little watch. She swallowed it one day. She took a dose of Epsom salts to pass the time away.
Mary had a little watch. She swallowed it one day. She took a dose of Epsom salts to pass the time away.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Procedures (Protsidoori) 2
Hydro-Massage - three procedures, taken in order, to stimulate blood circulation. This area is run by two very nice women with perpetually limp hair, damp lab coats and moss growing on their north sides.
In the first, I stand in a large cold drafty stall and get hosed off, much like a washrack at Agribition but without the blow driers and curry combs. The temperature and pressure are set to just under Hog Scald and Paint Peel. Olya directs the hose over each section of my carcass, with rapid movements to minimize skin damage. Then I go and stand for five minutes in a cage of vertical pipes with holes drilled to direct water spray all around me in little jets, much like a car wash. I kept an eye open for the rotating rags to appear and knock me senseless. This is not relaxing.
Second is a large tub of comfortably warm water, circulated back through a hose, which Yulia uses to massage the same muscles as Olya but this time underwater. The problem is I float like scum on a pond, and the volume and pressure of the hose are about the same as for hydraulic mining. I must keep submerged or suffer serious erosion. In my struggle to stay mostly under water, I get my foot in the water exit and the suction nearly takes my leg off. This is not relaxing.
Finally, relaxing! Ten minutes soaking in a tub of warm water treated with a couple of dollops of very black extract of pine needles to spruce up your skin. The first time, they had the tub full to the brim. I was instructed to get in and lie down.
The Tsunami devastated three villages and a goat shed.
In the first, I stand in a large cold drafty stall and get hosed off, much like a washrack at Agribition but without the blow driers and curry combs. The temperature and pressure are set to just under Hog Scald and Paint Peel. Olya directs the hose over each section of my carcass, with rapid movements to minimize skin damage. Then I go and stand for five minutes in a cage of vertical pipes with holes drilled to direct water spray all around me in little jets, much like a car wash. I kept an eye open for the rotating rags to appear and knock me senseless. This is not relaxing.
Second is a large tub of comfortably warm water, circulated back through a hose, which Yulia uses to massage the same muscles as Olya but this time underwater. The problem is I float like scum on a pond, and the volume and pressure of the hose are about the same as for hydraulic mining. I must keep submerged or suffer serious erosion. In my struggle to stay mostly under water, I get my foot in the water exit and the suction nearly takes my leg off. This is not relaxing.
Finally, relaxing! Ten minutes soaking in a tub of warm water treated with a couple of dollops of very black extract of pine needles to spruce up your skin. The first time, they had the tub full to the brim. I was instructed to get in and lie down.
The Tsunami devastated three villages and a goat shed.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Procedures (Protsidoori)
There must be hundreds of different “procedures” available at this spa, to which one can be assigned based on complaints (treatment) or general condition (maintenance). I will only deal with our procedures in the next few blogs.
Hot mud – Every two days Tanya soaked her hands and feet in hot mineralized mud for her arthritis. It seems to help as her knuckle is not so swollen today but we’ll see how long it lasts.
Massage – Every two days we got a massage from a beefy old lady with ahms like Ahnold. (What am I saying old, she was likely 60. Ok, fine, she was old). This was a very relaxing 20 minutes for me and one of the most enjoyable procedures.
Electro-Massage – By placing electrodes and running current through them, specific muscles can be forced to contract and relax. We called it the dead frog jump in Physiology class 40 years ago (as opposed to the dead cat bounce). Tanya had an electric comb run through her hair for 10 minutes to “massage” the veins in her head so they would not be so sensitive to weather changes. I expected her to return like someone from “One Flew over the Cuckoo’s Nest” after a couple of treatments but she said it was quite good.
Because my lower back has been playing havoc, I get a daily double dose at two different rhythms. Two electrodes on each side of my back, weighted down with sandbags, covered with a blanket. I was curious so stuck my hand under the sandbag and it snapped at me like an electric fencer. I didn’t do it again.
Hot mud – Every two days Tanya soaked her hands and feet in hot mineralized mud for her arthritis. It seems to help as her knuckle is not so swollen today but we’ll see how long it lasts.
Massage – Every two days we got a massage from a beefy old lady with ahms like Ahnold. (What am I saying old, she was likely 60. Ok, fine, she was old). This was a very relaxing 20 minutes for me and one of the most enjoyable procedures.
Electro-Massage – By placing electrodes and running current through them, specific muscles can be forced to contract and relax. We called it the dead frog jump in Physiology class 40 years ago (as opposed to the dead cat bounce). Tanya had an electric comb run through her hair for 10 minutes to “massage” the veins in her head so they would not be so sensitive to weather changes. I expected her to return like someone from “One Flew over the Cuckoo’s Nest” after a couple of treatments but she said it was quite good.
Because my lower back has been playing havoc, I get a daily double dose at two different rhythms. Two electrodes on each side of my back, weighted down with sandbags, covered with a blanket. I was curious so stuck my hand under the sandbag and it snapped at me like an electric fencer. I didn’t do it again.
Monday, April 13, 2009
They may call the Wind Mariah...
But here they call the water Naftusia. Naftusia water is THE miracle water that brings tens of thousands of people to Truskavets every year. There is a central “pump house” (or maybe several?) where everyone goes to drink their assigned amount of water. It is dispensed in 50 ml doses from 100 mls to 250 mls by hundreds of electronic taps like Mcdonalds soft drinks. I was assigned 200 mls one hour before meals and 100 mls 30 minutes after. The water has a sulphurous smell and slight oily taste. My tummy has felt queasy since we got here.
It is a 15 minute walk downhill from Pivdennii to the water hole. We didn’t always have time to walk down so bought a thermos to bring a supply back to our room. The picture below gives all the claims for this wonderful aqua of which there is none like it anywhere else on earth, of course. My association with the purebred beef industry taught me to recognize hi-tech BS when I see or hear it and the jargon seemed somehow familiar.
Is there any sound scientific proof that this water does all this stuff? Not likely and none needed. One gets the same circular argument as from the Chinese when you ask why people believe in doing certain obviously ridiculous superstitious things. We do it because it works. How do you know it works? Well, it must work because we’ve been doing it for thousands of years. End of discussion.
It is a 15 minute walk downhill from Pivdennii to the water hole. We didn’t always have time to walk down so bought a thermos to bring a supply back to our room. The picture below gives all the claims for this wonderful aqua of which there is none like it anywhere else on earth, of course. My association with the purebred beef industry taught me to recognize hi-tech BS when I see or hear it and the jargon seemed somehow familiar.
Is there any sound scientific proof that this water does all this stuff? Not likely and none needed. One gets the same circular argument as from the Chinese when you ask why people believe in doing certain obviously ridiculous superstitious things. We do it because it works. How do you know it works? Well, it must work because we’ve been doing it for thousands of years. End of discussion.
The water from three other springs is also described. I was struck by the method of expressing the chemical formulae of the mineralization. My chemistry is a little rusty but the general idea was easily understood. I assume M is molarity?
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Dr. Yuri Grigorovich
Day 1, right after lunch, we had our first appointment with the Spa Doctor. People come here for the good of their health and they get a thorough physical exam, with lab work as part of the package. Yuri Grigorovich is reputed to be the best urologist in Ukraine, (Hmmm…Yuri the Urologist met a gynecologist…has potential, need to work on it.)
This man is a drawing card for the spa and a God-send for 60 year old males with the usual 60 year old male plumbing problems. He asked all the right questions and then sent me for an ultra-sound (non-intrusive) which was totally modern and run by a retired doctor who also knew his stuff.
Yuri Grigorovich assigned us our daily intake of Truskavets water (more on that later), gave us five jars for urine samples at various times and told us to come back the next day when the analysis would be available. He also assigned our procedures (more on that later).
The sample jars reminded me of a sight gag on a Russian comedy show - a hapless football team with an incompetent but tyrannical coach. This skit had the players bringing urine samples for drug testing. The team files by the table and each drops off little jars of various sizes and shapes as expected except in the middle of it all one player sets down a three-litre jar full.
So the next day we are back in the doctor’s office. I sit. Yuri Grigorovich asks questions in Russian, Tanya answers. She knows me better than I do anyhow and we had been through all this a while back with our local doctor. Once in a while she would include me in the conversation or I would recognize a few words and ask what it was about.
Yuri Grigorovich (in Russian): I need a semen sample, a urine sample and a stool sample.
Al: What did he say?
Tanya: He said give him your underwear.
This man is a drawing card for the spa and a God-send for 60 year old males with the usual 60 year old male plumbing problems. He asked all the right questions and then sent me for an ultra-sound (non-intrusive) which was totally modern and run by a retired doctor who also knew his stuff.
Yuri Grigorovich assigned us our daily intake of Truskavets water (more on that later), gave us five jars for urine samples at various times and told us to come back the next day when the analysis would be available. He also assigned our procedures (more on that later).
The sample jars reminded me of a sight gag on a Russian comedy show - a hapless football team with an incompetent but tyrannical coach. This skit had the players bringing urine samples for drug testing. The team files by the table and each drops off little jars of various sizes and shapes as expected except in the middle of it all one player sets down a three-litre jar full.
So the next day we are back in the doctor’s office. I sit. Yuri Grigorovich asks questions in Russian, Tanya answers. She knows me better than I do anyhow and we had been through all this a while back with our local doctor. Once in a while she would include me in the conversation or I would recognize a few words and ask what it was about.
Yuri Grigorovich (in Russian): I need a semen sample, a urine sample and a stool sample.
Al: What did he say?
Tanya: He said give him your underwear.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
3:10 to Truskavets
We left P’yatikhatki at about 3:30 pm on Sunday April 6th. The Dnipropetrovs'k - Truskavets passenger trains run twice daily and we took the later one. We arrived in Monday at about 12:30 pm or 21 hours later. We could have driven in the same time but it would have cost us a lot more for gas and a night’s lodging. The train wandered across western Ukraine stopping at 25 towns and cities. Someday I will make a map of the route.
In the background you can see the overhead walk which is 50 steps up and crosses 12 tracks on either side of the station area. There are three platforms but you better be on the right one when the train comes as you have to cross the tracks to get to two of them.
Two years ago, I had ridden the same train from L’viv to Dnipropetrovs'k and figured that there had to be a quicker way to go about 1000 km. There isn’t.
The train had seen better days and the coaches were not like the Kyiv to Dnipropetrovs'k run at all. Windows were filthy, washrooms just one cut above Chinese trains, but the bedding was clean and the tea water hot. We had our four-person compartment to ourselves for the first 6 hours which was nice. Then a young man got on who went as far as Bili Tserkva, then two women who went as far as L’viv. We had the last two hours to ourselves again.
Truskavets is booming. It is a spa town and there are spas everywhere and new ones being built, economy or no. Too bad there was no money left for road repair. The road from the railway station to the Sanatoria Pivdennii was more like our village main street in Marianivka. Which is to say one could bury a sizeable herd of livestock deep enough to meet Health of Animals Regulations without too much digging.
Our Sanatorium was built in 1976, so was Soviet style. The bathrooms had been upgraded but the rest of the building was quite as it had been for three decades. Kuchma (Ex-President, not our cat) used to come here when he was head of the Soviet Space Program out of Dnipropetrovs'k so it must have been pretty classy place in its time. It had a wonderful arboretum.
The train had seen better days and the coaches were not like the Kyiv to Dnipropetrovs'k run at all. Windows were filthy, washrooms just one cut above Chinese trains, but the bedding was clean and the tea water hot. We had our four-person compartment to ourselves for the first 6 hours which was nice. Then a young man got on who went as far as Bili Tserkva, then two women who went as far as L’viv. We had the last two hours to ourselves again.
Truskavets is booming. It is a spa town and there are spas everywhere and new ones being built, economy or no. Too bad there was no money left for road repair. The road from the railway station to the Sanatoria Pivdennii was more like our village main street in Marianivka. Which is to say one could bury a sizeable herd of livestock deep enough to meet Health of Animals Regulations without too much digging.
Our Sanatorium was built in 1976, so was Soviet style. The bathrooms had been upgraded but the rest of the building was quite as it had been for three decades. Kuchma (Ex-President, not our cat) used to come here when he was head of the Soviet Space Program out of Dnipropetrovs'k so it must have been pretty classy place in its time. It had a wonderful arboretum.
We found our room and settled in. Expecting internet was too much. Hot water was intermittent. What can I say? We needed showers before we dared go for lunch. No hot water!? Ok!! Desperate, I took an icy mountain-cold shower. Of course, the hot water was working by the time Tanya got in ten minutes later. I get no respect.
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Last night at home for two weeks
We are ready to go. More or less. Clothes clean, gathered, folded and packed. Yard and garden beaten into shape, not totally but will have to do.
Our neighbour Natasha, daughter Dasha and boyfriend Sergei were back yesterday to transplant strawberries. Natasha had thinned out her huge strawberry patch and brought us the spares. 120 of them – to go with the 120 we already have. Lots of jam for next winter and even more the winter after.
Dasha was back today and dug in about 15 or 20 blackberry bushes and 5 or 6 tea roses. Sergei and his brother came along and Tanya had them take out another apple tree. Those kids can work. Dasha is a sweetheart. Seventeen, cute as a bug’s ear, always smiling, just finished high-school (Grade 11) and will write University entrance next week. Sergei will go for his medical and if he passes will be mustered in to the Ukrainian Army for two years. If the romance lasts, those two will do OK. Likely never have much money but will never do without.
We hooked up the hoses today and Tanya watered the raspberries and some of the other transplants. She spent all day in our “greenhouse” transplanting tiny little plants (petunias?) into individual places where they will grow big enough to move outside in two weeks.
Maxim and Ivan helped me walk the dogs tonight. The boys had spent the afternoon playing with two big cardboard boxes left from our Care packages of a year ago. Well taped up to hold together. One would get inside a box and the other would roll it down a hill. Oh, to be young again.
On our walk home we ran into Katya and Yuri out in their big garden. Along with Babushka, another woman and their oldest daughter (about 20) and their dog EMMA. My dogs were quite enthused but she put the run on them. Katya will look after the house while we are away. Watering all Tanya’s plants should keep her busy. I need to go through and do a count again but it is up over 30 plus all the boxes of seedlings.
Tomorrow morning we will go to the big Sunday market to see if I can find a pair of rubber footwear for garden duty. Our train leaves P’yatikhatki at 2:00 so we have time.
I hope that resort has internet. I have two projects to work on, two books to read and if there is no internet I need to take more books.
Our neighbour Natasha, daughter Dasha and boyfriend Sergei were back yesterday to transplant strawberries. Natasha had thinned out her huge strawberry patch and brought us the spares. 120 of them – to go with the 120 we already have. Lots of jam for next winter and even more the winter after.
Dasha was back today and dug in about 15 or 20 blackberry bushes and 5 or 6 tea roses. Sergei and his brother came along and Tanya had them take out another apple tree. Those kids can work. Dasha is a sweetheart. Seventeen, cute as a bug’s ear, always smiling, just finished high-school (Grade 11) and will write University entrance next week. Sergei will go for his medical and if he passes will be mustered in to the Ukrainian Army for two years. If the romance lasts, those two will do OK. Likely never have much money but will never do without.
We hooked up the hoses today and Tanya watered the raspberries and some of the other transplants. She spent all day in our “greenhouse” transplanting tiny little plants (petunias?) into individual places where they will grow big enough to move outside in two weeks.
Maxim and Ivan helped me walk the dogs tonight. The boys had spent the afternoon playing with two big cardboard boxes left from our Care packages of a year ago. Well taped up to hold together. One would get inside a box and the other would roll it down a hill. Oh, to be young again.
On our walk home we ran into Katya and Yuri out in their big garden. Along with Babushka, another woman and their oldest daughter (about 20) and their dog EMMA. My dogs were quite enthused but she put the run on them. Katya will look after the house while we are away. Watering all Tanya’s plants should keep her busy. I need to go through and do a count again but it is up over 30 plus all the boxes of seedlings.
Tomorrow morning we will go to the big Sunday market to see if I can find a pair of rubber footwear for garden duty. Our train leaves P’yatikhatki at 2:00 so we have time.
I hope that resort has internet. I have two projects to work on, two books to read and if there is no internet I need to take more books.
Friday, April 3, 2009
Truskavets
If you Google Truskavets Spas you will get about 3000 hits. It is the Spa capital of western Ukraine apparently, noted for its wonderful water which is good for all ailments internal and external. We leave on Sunday by train for two weeks at a resort/spa/sanitorium, the name of which escapes me. I pray it has internet.
Europeans love spas but in Ukraine they are a religion. People actually belive that one's health is improved immensely by going to a spa. It was one of the perks of the former system. Companies sent employees all expenses paid. Since husbands and wives usually worked for different employers, they would go at different times to different sanitoria for two or three weeks. (Did I mention the divorce rate is 70% here?).
Now, I walk my dogs through the local cemetary and if the number of deaths between 45 and 65 years of age is any indicator of the life prolonging effects of spa going, I remain to be convinced. However...we bought bottled Truskavets water at the grocery store three days ago and after chugging half a bottle, announced myself miraculously cured of all ailments and infirmities...it was not considered funny.
So we are going. Of course they only take cash so I had to pull enough from my account to cover. Given the withdrawal limits, this would take three days. March 31 - Fine. April 2 - no connection between Ukraine banks and American banks. April 3 - same. Panic. Email my Customer Service Rep at Conexus Credit Union. Is your system down? No. Phone Tanya's bank. There is periodically a disconnect between American and Ukrainian banks. Just keep trying.
Email my CSR at CCU. Can you give me a contact who deals with, in this case, Maestro so I can find out why their system is not connecting across the pond? Answer: "I called our internal person who said the problem must be in Ukraine and the bankmachines may have been serviced when I was there (THREE banks?) or there was an error in communication. Now PFO."
Doh! The only box this person ever thought outside of must have been a cornflakes box. And the first time in 35 years, I wanted to move my account. But where? Credit Union service is incredibly good, their people are wonderful and helpful. Maybe this one was just having a bad day (caused by me).
The sytem was back up by midnight - we made three trips to check and finally it worked. We are so dependent on our electronic age communication systems! What will we do when they don't work for real sometime?
Europeans love spas but in Ukraine they are a religion. People actually belive that one's health is improved immensely by going to a spa. It was one of the perks of the former system. Companies sent employees all expenses paid. Since husbands and wives usually worked for different employers, they would go at different times to different sanitoria for two or three weeks. (Did I mention the divorce rate is 70% here?).
Now, I walk my dogs through the local cemetary and if the number of deaths between 45 and 65 years of age is any indicator of the life prolonging effects of spa going, I remain to be convinced. However...we bought bottled Truskavets water at the grocery store three days ago and after chugging half a bottle, announced myself miraculously cured of all ailments and infirmities...it was not considered funny.
So we are going. Of course they only take cash so I had to pull enough from my account to cover. Given the withdrawal limits, this would take three days. March 31 - Fine. April 2 - no connection between Ukraine banks and American banks. April 3 - same. Panic. Email my Customer Service Rep at Conexus Credit Union. Is your system down? No. Phone Tanya's bank. There is periodically a disconnect between American and Ukrainian banks. Just keep trying.
Email my CSR at CCU. Can you give me a contact who deals with, in this case, Maestro so I can find out why their system is not connecting across the pond? Answer: "I called our internal person who said the problem must be in Ukraine and the bankmachines may have been serviced when I was there (THREE banks?) or there was an error in communication. Now PFO."
Doh! The only box this person ever thought outside of must have been a cornflakes box. And the first time in 35 years, I wanted to move my account. But where? Credit Union service is incredibly good, their people are wonderful and helpful. Maybe this one was just having a bad day (caused by me).
The sytem was back up by midnight - we made three trips to check and finally it worked. We are so dependent on our electronic age communication systems! What will we do when they don't work for real sometime?
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